Because there was a new Zelda coming in six months and I figured it was the safer bet than saving up and buying a brand new console that might not have had the kinks worked out.

Mario Kart 8 a nice bonus.

Also I feel a certain satisfaction that I was able to beat Ross's Companion Spring and Boss Battles levels in Mario Maker without losing 40 years of my life.

So normally I wouldn't turn to ebay for something like this, but it turns out Nintendo has an official account there, where they're selling refurbished Wii U consoles for $200. That's 70 bucks less than I could get a pre-owned at Gamestop.

I went ahead and ordered one, and it just shipped out. If it ends up working just fine, my only concern will be getting MK8 back.

Since it was a digital title and my old Wii U is borked beyond repair. Normally I imagine I'd have to call them or fill out a help ticket to have the ID transferred to the second U system. But since the ID was created on a 3DS that I still own, I wonder if it'll just let me link my 3DS with this new Wii U.

Update!

Wii U arrived and it works well. I've already tried WindWaker, Twilight Princess, Smash Bros, Mario 3D World and the Nintendo Land game it came with, and they all work perfectly.

FOR SOME REASON THOUGH, Breath of the Wild won't work. The disc appears perfect, but when I put it in the system, it makes some weird ticking sounds, takes longer than any of the other discs, and says "Invalid Disc"

Thankfully, I kept both the case and the receipt, and it hasn't been 90 days since the game came out, so I can exchange it. 

Thankfully I don't need a Nintendo Network ID to play these games. Gotta wait for Nintendo to transfer my ID to this new console before I can get at least Mario Maker back. Hopefully I can get Mario Kart 8 back, which was pre-installed on the console. my 3DS e-shop shows the receipts for the DLC, so I'll surely get that back at least.

You should get MK8 back. You bought them along with the console.

And I did get it back. They figured out their nonsense and now I'm logged into my NNID on this new console and downloading those two games back.

AND, I went to Walmart this morning and exchanged BoTW. It's now subjecting me to that twenty minute update it needed to do beforehand, but it's worth it. I can finally die happy.